Kelsey's "Corrections" part 2

Howdy from Texas!

First off, I greatly appreciate the positive feedback regarding my post. I’m sorry it has taken so long to get back to you. There are a few reasons.

1. This trip is exhausting. The free time I have I choose to spend sleeping, sorry.

2. As my musical idol Taylor Swift said on her new album release, (Oct. 25, 2010) “You have to live a lot to have a lot to write about”…or something relatively close to that. In her style, I prefer quality over quantity, and needed some material to enlighten you all with. After a week or so with the Tates, you can rest assured I have plenty.

Here goes my view, in list form, as I prefer.

1. Let’s start with the “Soundtrack” of this trip. In the Muir woods I suggested the theme song be “My Name Is” by Eminem. Any rap aficionado knows that the main line is “Hi…my name is…my name is…my name is [insert record spin sound effect] Slim Shady”. Now, the Muir woods were absolutely covered in shade. This is what I remember best about that hour and a half. My thought process when thinking of what song would fit our experience there was “Hmm…shade…shade song…slim shady”. Bam. However, my family shot down this idea with the retort that they didn’t want to explain my simple, yet genius logic. Sorry guys, I know you’re as disappointed as I am.

2. What’s on my mind other than ice cream, Target, or whether I have clean underwear? You guessed it: Dr. Pepper. My favorite beverage. Let me tell you, Dr. Pepper is not a nationally accepted drink. First off, like Chick-fil-A, I am informed that this is a “Southern thing”. (Who knew I was so Southern??) I discover the all-you-can-eat buffet in Vegas has Dr. P and I am thrilled. I have gone without it for days at a time, if you can believe it! So, our waiter Paul heads to the back and brings me back an ice cold glass of heaven. SIKE. It tastes like Dr. Pepper mixed with Root Beer, which if you have never tried such a concoction, is disgusting. Turns out ALL the drinks at this place taste like Root Beer…we’re talking the Mt. Dew, the Pepsi, and the Sierra Mist. How do I know? I asked for them all. Not only was my Dr. Pepper experience quite literally tainted, so was my overall quest for a thirst quencher. P.S. Texas has Dr. Pepper, but it has a weird aftertaste too. After testing around, we discovered it’s consistent throughout the Lonestar State.

3. This brings me to the discussion of everyone’s favorite member of the Tate fam, Tatertot Mom. At the same all-you-can-eat-buffet, Mom was drinking a “Diet Pepsi”. She claimed all of dinner that hers was the only drink that didn’t taste like Root Beer. Mom was a happy camper. When she went up to the buffet we all tried her drink and in fact it was just as Root Beer infused as the rest, if not more. In the same fashion, today she ate half of Dad’s Snicker’s ice cream before realizing it tasted absolutely nothing like the Reeses she had ordered. She then switched with dad and he got the rightful Snickers which Mom had successfully already demolished half of. Point: Give Mom anything, tell her what you want her to think it is, and she’ll believe you. We’re all just as concerned for her going mind as you are.

4. An update on our “teams”. Josh and Mom have dubbed themselves the “A team” and have degradingly referred to Dad and I as the “B team” on numerous occasions. They partake in high fives basically every hour, on the hour, and make remarks like “See that? That was a high five! That was a win! Oooo good one partner! Go Team A!” You can imagine how fast that gets stale. Dad and I would rather be addressed as “Team One” because we are, as you know, Number One. We have a secret handshake that cannot be disclosed on the Internet, for fear Mom and Josh will see. But have no fear World Wide Web, we’re winning the Alphabet Game, and most likely have more points for Best Tours. (Point values still to be awarded and posted)

5. I told you about our dinners where we describe the best parts of our day. This time has been lovingly dubbed “FART”. So naturally we enjoy saying things like “Let’s fart!”, “Who’s gonna fart?” or “Ready to fart?” However, we would NEVER just gain pleasure from silly phrases like this, but like everything with the Tate family, there is a purpose. FART stands for a combination of the beginning of the word favorite and the end of the word part. Aka Fa + rt = fart. Or, if you prefer, “Forum About Road Trip”, with each first letter taking on part of the acronym.

6. As some of you may have seen on Twitter, we weren’t kidding when we said this was no vacation. Folks, we have walked 44 blocks uphill in San Fran, we have driven 7+ hours in one day, and we have all jogged through rainstorms multiple times in a desperate attempt to see all we can and stay on schedule. Most people do not have the grueling determination and sheer will power to survive in such an atmosphere, but I am proud to say we have had no human casualty along the way. (only two pairs of sunglasses) Needless to say this trip has transformed my idea of a “long drive” or a “short walk”. Now, when we stare at a map and see a landmark 10 blocks away we all go “Oh no problem! This beating Texas sun and humid air is nothing for a measly 10 blocks!” The past few days I have woken up and asked Dad how far we have to go and he’ll say “Only about 4 hours” and we’ll shrug and think no big deal. I think it’s safe to say we’re turning superhuman.

7. Lastly, in reference to the music video posted below. While it has entertained many of you, I would like to give you some background info on how it came into existence. We were driving down the Idaho roadway and Josh suggested singing and dancing on the camera, which was no big deal because as I mentioned in my last post, we had done this before. However, right as we started getting into the song and the bass was rocking the rental car, we heard sirens and saw flashing lights. Our hearts stopped. A cop had pulled out behind us. Josh slyly grabbed the cam from the dash and turned off the radio, Dad slowed down 5 miles an hour, Mom gasped as usual when she sees other cars on the highway, and I recessed quickly to the backseat and slipped my seatbelt on. The car was silent as we held our breath. My mind was racing with how I was to explain to the officer that was about to pull us over that we were making a music video…

Then, he passed us. Turns out he was headed for an accident up the road. How anticlimactic huh? Anyways, the moral is you should probably watch for cops, even in Idaho. I’m also sad to say the video YOU saw was actually the second take we did after the cop scare. To see the first you can email me with your credit card number at tatek10@highpoint.edu :-)

We’re on the home stretch! Thanks for your comments and feedback, we all get overly excited to hear from you all. It’s always nice to hear from family, friends, and harmless stalkers as we gallivant across the country. Miss you and see many of you very soon!

Love,

Kelsey